language

there is no egg in the eggplant

nor ham in the hamburger

and neither pine nor apple in the pineapple

English muffins were not invented in England

French fries were not invented in France

.

we sometimes take English for granted

but if we examine its paradoxes we find

that quicksand takes you down slowly

boxing rings are square

and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig

.

if writers write, how come fingers don't fing

if the plural of tooth is teeth

shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth

if the teacher's taught

why hasn't the preacher praught?

.

if a vegetarian eats vegetables

what the heck does a humanitarian eat!?

why do people recite at a play

yet play at a recital?

park on driveways and
drive on parkways?

..

you have to marvel at the unique lunacy

of a language where a house can burn up as

it burns down

and in which you fill in a form

by filling it out

and a bell is only heard once it goes off!

.

English was invented by people, not computer

and it reflects the creativity of the human race

which, of course, isn't a race at all

.

that is why

when the stars are out they are visible

but when the lights are out they are invisible

and why it is that when I wind up my watch

it starts

but when I wind up this observation

it ends

.

sweet nice weekend, folks :)